Tommy Cooper

This lorry full of tortoises collided with a van full of terrapins. It was a turtle disaster. Give others a giggle…

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Tommy Cooper

I phoned the local gym and I asked if they could teach me how to do the splits. He said, “How flexible are you?” I said, “I can’t make Tuesdays or Thursdays.” Give others a giggle…

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Tommy Cooper

I was in the jungle and there was this monkey with a tin opener. I said, “You don’t need a tin opener to peel a banana.” He said, “No, this is for the custard.” Give others a giggle…

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Tommy Cooper

I met this bloke with a didgeridoo and he was playing Dancing Queen on it. I thought, “That’s Aboriginal.” Give others a giggle…

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