Blond

Q: What does a blonde do if she is not in bed by 10?
A: She picks up her purse and goes home.

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S0ftware tagl1ne

“my software doesn’t have bugs… it just develops random features.”

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Who wears what?

A young couple, just married, were in their honeymoon suite on their wedding night, As they were undressing for bed the husband who was a
big burly man tossed his pants to his bride and said “Here, put these on”. She put them on and the waist was twice the size of her body.
“I can’t wear your pants” she said. “That’s right”, said the husband “and don’t you ever forget it. I’m the one who wears the pants in this family”.

With that she flipped him her knickers and said “Try these on”. He tried them on and found he could only get them as far as his kneecaps.
“Hell”, he said “I can’t get into your knickers !” She replied “That’s right, and that’s the way it’s going to be until your fucking attitude changes !”

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What plan?

It is the month of August, on the shores of the Black Sea . It is raining, and the little town looks totally deserted. It is tough times, everybody is in debt, and everybody lives on credit.
Suddenly, a rich tourist comes to town.
He enters the only hotel, lays a 100 Euro note on the reception counter, and goes to inspect the rooms upstairs in order to pick one.
The hotel proprietor takes the 100 Euro note and runs to pay his debt to the butcher.
The Butcher takes the 100 Euro note, and runs to pay his debt to the pig grower.
The pig grower takes the 100 Euro note, and runs to pay his debt to the supplier of his feed and fuel..
The supplier of feed and fuel takes the 100 Euro note and runs to pay his debt to the town prostitute that in these hard times, gave her service on credit.
The hooker runs to the hotel, and pays off her debt with the 100 Euro note to the hotel proprietor to pay for the rooms that she rented when she brought her clients there.
The hotel proprietor then lays the 100 Euro note back on the counter so that the rich tourist will not suspect anything.
At that moment, the rich tourist comes down after inspecting the rooms, and takes his 100 Euro note, after saying that he did not like any of the rooms, and leaves town.
No one earned anything.
However, the whole town is now without debt, and looks to the future with a lot of optimism..
And that, ladies and gentlemen, is how the United States, Icelandic and UK Governments are doing business today.

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3some

In public too!

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