How I laughed and laughed...

2016 10-29

Ambitions…

We make you laugh every day
I want to be that guy!
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2016 10-05

Kids say the dearest things

Teacher: “Kids, what does the fat chicken give you?”
Student: “Meat!”
Teacher: “Very good! Now what does the fat pig give you?”
Student: “Bacon!”
Teacher: “Great! And what does the fat cow give you?”
Student: “Homework!”

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2016 09-29

Old is Gold!

I have finally found a support group that fits my life stage!

 

Get off my lawn!

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2016 08-05

Little Johnny…

Teacher: “If I gave you 2 cats and another 2 cats and another 2, how many would you have?”
Johnny: “Seven.”
Teacher: “No, listen carefully… If I gave you two cats, and another two cats and another two, how many would you have?”
Johnny: “Seven.”
Teacher: “Let me put it to you differently. If I gave you two apples, and another two apples and another two, how many would you have?”
Johnny: “Six.”
Teacher: “Good. Now if I gave you two cats, and another two cats and another two, how many would you have?”
Johnny: “Seven!”
Teacher: “Johnny, where in the heck do you get seven from?!”
Johnny: “Because I’ve already got a freaking cat!”

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2016 04-05

Best interview ever

Reaching the end of a job interview, the Human Resources Officer asks a young engineer fresh out of the Massachusetts Institute of Technology, “And what starting salary are you looking for?”

 

The engineer replies, “In the region of $125,000 a year, depending on the benefits package.”

 

The interviewer inquires, “Well, what would you say to a package of five weeks vacation, 14 paid holidays, full medical and dental, company matching retirement fund to 50% of salary, and a company car leased every two years, say, a red Corvette?”

 

The engineer sits up straight and says, “Wow! Are you kidding?”

 

The interviewer replies, “Yeah, but you started it.”

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2015 12-05

Jokes for kids

Q: Why was six scared of seven?
A: Because seven “ate” nine.

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2015 11-05

Add it up…

Q: Why couldn’t the blonde add 10 + 5 on a calculator?

A: She couldn’t find the “10” button.

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